Editor’s note: This is the first in a three-part series we’re calling Loving Them to the Outdoors and Beyond, in which we explore the power of the outdoors to help us connect with—and care for—each other.

If you’re a parent, caregiver, or simply love a young person, I’m sure you’ve wondered more than once if screens are taking over childhood.

I remember the first time my kids told me they don’t really play with toys anymore and that they’d rather have V-Bucks to purchase “skins” for their avatars. I wondered, Where did I go wrong—and why did I spend so much money on that dollhouse?

So, I did what I usually do: I went to the internet.

Hey, I’m an adult. The screen is where I get my data.

There was no shortage of advice. Set limits. Turn off notifications. No tech at the table.

But then I felt a gentle prompting: Are you asking the wrong question?

What if it’s not simply about how to get kids off screens? What if the better question is:

How do I help them experience—and fall in love with—the real world?

Here in West Michigan, the Outdoor Discovery Center has been asking similar questions through its Unplugged: Disconnect to Reconnect initiative. One idea from that work has really stayed with me: reducing screen time is only half the equation.

We have to think about what fills the space instead.

What is screen time crowding out?

I don’t believe technology is the enemy. Screens help children learn, create, communicate, and stay connected.

The American Academy of Pediatrics’ 5 C’s of Media Guidance reflects that nuance. Rather than focusing only on a single number of acceptable screen hours, the guidance encourages parents to pay attention to what media use may be crowding out: sleep, reading, play, homework, family relationships, chores, and other experiences children need to thrive.

That distinction matters to me.

Watching a movie together as a family is different from spending an hour doomscrolling or disappearing into an endless feed of comedic animal videos. 

I DON’T want to raise children who are anti-technology.

I DO want to raise children whose lives are full enough, interesting enough, and connected enough that technology doesn’t become the center of them.

But I have a sneaking suspicion that before I can ask that question about my kids, I need to answer it for myself.

Has technology become too central to my life?

How about yours?

As we begin this series, maybe that is the place to start.

Not with another rule for our kids. With an honest look at our own life.

Before we can guide our children toward a balanced relationship with technology, we have to examine our own. What is digital noise crowding out in your own day? Perhaps you could sit with that question and take a quiet moment to listen to the answer.

In Part 2 of our series, I share how an unexpected question from my high schooler forced me to look in the mirror—and how we can begin modeling a real-world life that our kids actually want to “catch.”