One of our Caregiving Basics at Wisdom of the Wounded is “Preserving the Dignity” of those we care for. This is especially true when visiting someone’s hospital room. (This applies to visits at a nursing home too.)

Years ago, a chaplain at our local hospital told me to remember that a hospital room is the patient’s temporary home, and we are guests.

So, keeping that in mind, here are a few suggestions to honor a person’s dignity and their space.

First, knock before entering and ask, “Is this a good time for me to visit?” We wouldn’t barge into someone’s home without ringing the doorbell, would we? Even if you have been given permission by the hospital staff or a family member to come in, the person in the bed may need to rest—or simply may not feel like having company.

Once you’re there, resist the temptation to rearrange things. Again, just like if you were visiting someone’s home, you probably wouldn’t do these things uninvited. Don’t open the curtains, open a window, throw out the flowers, or move belongings around without asking.

Instead, you might say, “Is there anything you would like me to do for you while I’m here?”

And think about where you sit. Choose a place where the person can easily see you, but don’t sit on the bed. Remember that the room belongs to the patient, even if only temporarily.

There’s another small courtesy that matters, too: be careful about conversations you have outside the room. Whispering with nurses or visitors in the hallway can make a patient wonder what you are saying about them.

So, please always: Respect the person’s space, privacy, and dignity.

God Bless