Sometimes it’s easy to forget that not all children can celebrate their father on Father’s Day.  This might be due to abuse, neglect, or desertion. In all of these situations a relationship has been broken.

A lovely young woman recently said to me, “How can I celebrate Father’s Day when I do not have a relationship with my father? Years ago my father told me that he wanted nothing to do with me or my family.   I was told that we were done, and asked to stay away, citing my reconciliation with my mother as ‘the stupidest thing I’ve ever done.’ ”

Sandy* continued, “I have made my peace with this and now see that this is not someone I want in my life or in the lives of my children. But it still is a loss and it hurts.”

So, how does Sandy celebrate Father’s Day?

She says that the song, “Piece by Piece” by Kelly Clarkson has helped change her focus from her father to the father of her children.  On Father’s Day Sandy will celebrate her husband who is a kind, loving and involved father.

The words from the song, “Piece by Piece” that help Sandy are:

He never walks away
He never asks for money
He takes care of me
He loves me

Piece by piece

He restored my faith

That a man can be kind

And a father could stay

Thank you Lord for all the Fathers who are kind and who stay.

*Sandy is not her real name. We’ve changed her name to protect her privacy. Read Sandy’s full story, “My Experience with Parental Alienation Syndrome.”

Karen Mulder

Karen Mulder

Karen Mulder is the founder of the Wisdom of the Wounded ministry. She lives in Holland, Michigan with her husband Larry.


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