James Cook says in our book, The Compassionate Congregation, “The most difficult time for my wife, Jean, and me was dealing with the two and a half year losing battle with cancer waged by our nineteen year old son, Paul.  Within days of the diagnosis, his left leg was amputated two-thirds above the knee, and after metastasis he endured a series of six lung surgeries”.

James emphasizes, “Care to those who are in grief means always asking about the crisis, not avoiding it. If it is too painful for the one suffering to talk about their grief, they will say so.  As caregivers, we need to remember that the crisis is the most important thing in their lives.  They will want to talk about it, perhaps cry about it.  Offering care can mean offering them an opportunity to do both in the presence of someone who loves them.”

Karen Mulder

Karen Mulder

Karen Mulder is the founder of the Wisdom of the Wounded ministry. She lives in Holland, Michigan with her husband Larry.

1 Comment

  1. Anna Murray

    That is do true Karen..we do want to talk about it. A part of us is gone we are so lonely and think of the day he or she passed away. I go over and over in my mind of the events of that last day..the last night. Wishing I had said I love you more than I did…really looked at t there face.trying to remember each detail..oh how I missJim. Be 2 yrs this August. Seems like just last week.can’t write anymore for the tears are falling. Thank you Karen for your inputs..been very helpful..love you your Sister from N.C…

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