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Someone once told me, “If you are with a person who is crying, do not hand them a Kleenex.”  Surprised, I questioned why?  He said, “because that signals to them that you want them to stop crying.”

Really?  Please listen to this:  If your friend (or loved one) is crying and their eyes and nose are producing little rivers running down their face, for heaven’s sake please hand them a Kleenex! It shows you are acknowledging their pain.

And please let them know that you feel their pain, by gently touching their shoulder (or arm) or by giving them a full hug. 

If a physical hug doesn’t seem appropriate, hug them with words from your heart, like these suggestions from author Kim Kramer:

• “I am so sorry that you are going through this.”
• “Your pain breaks my heart.”

So, when you are with a friend who is crying, please remember a Kleenex and a hug. 

For further advice about how to care for a friend who is crying, you may appreciate: Help Someone Cry and What to Say When Someone is Crying.