WISDOM
Don’t say, “I understand”
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02/07/2016

Dr. Rachel Remen, M.D. says, “When people are talking . . .listen to what they’re saying.  Care about it. Don’t interrupt.”

“One of my cancer patients told me that when she tried to tell her story people often interrupted to tell her that they once had something just like than happen to them.  Do you do that?”

When my mother had a stroke and I was very upset, a friend ask, “How are you doing?” I told her I was very upset and concerned. Then she preceded to say, “I understand.”  Then she preceded to tell me about when her mother had a stroke.

Dr Remen says, “When we interrupt what someone is saying to let them know that we understand, we move the focus of attention to ourselves.  When we listen, they know we care.  Many people with cancer talk about the relief of having someone just listen. A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well intentioned words.”

So try to be quiet and just listen to what the person is saying.

Photo credit: Fouquier

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