The fact that you are asking this question is so wonderful. The people who are grieving will be so pleased and touched in their hearts that someone else remembers their ongoing grief and the one who has died.
Start a note or a conversation by expressing your sadness: “This must be a very difficult time for you as you remember the death of your dear son, Phillip. I am so sorry about your on-going sorrow,” or “Thinking of you this week. Remembering. We love you.”
If you have some pictures of the deceased, you could send some pictures with a note saying something like: “Remembering. . . Thinking of you, ” or, “Our families certainly have had a lot of fun together. Sending hugs your way. Remember when Joe caught this fish and thought he had caught the biggest fish ever?”
“When there is a death, mark on next year’s calendar the date so you can remember the family in a special way. Very few people remember the anniversary date of a death. For those dearest to the deceased, however, that date is indelibly imprinted on their minds and in their hearts. They will dread it. Many experience a resurgence of sadness and depression, not only on the death anniversary date but for weeks preceding it. To be remembered on these dates with a note, flowers, or other appropriate gift lets them know they are not alone in remembering.” (Helping a Neighbor in Crisis, Lampman)
For more information on this topic, listen to the podcasts: invite conversation on the anniversary of a loved one’s death and share a memory on the anniversary of a loved one’s death.